A brief history of the project circumstances is as follows. With a 3 month lead in it was decided that a piece of work should begin culminating in a final delivery date of 11th September. The team comprised about 12 members from different disciplines and the preparation would involve some work in small teams and a great deal of individual work. All of which needed to link up when, for the first time, the whole team came together on 11th September.
Initially I was excited about being involved and then the magnitude of the project became apparent, at which point, the little voice in my head started its commentary
“Will you be good enough?”
“Those guys have done so much more than you, how come you are on this team?”
Throughout the preparation phase I felt varying degrees of 'OKness' and 'not OKness'. On good days I thought my contribution was valued or, at least, I’d “got away with it” and on bad days, I felt I ought to drop out and leave them to it.
So are nerves ok? It’s a good question and, in short, I’d say yes, definitely. However, this comes with some added datail. They are ok if they aren’t harming your health, happiness or performance. If any of these are being affected then you might need other strategies for managing nerves and anxiety.
The good thing about being nervous is
· It keeps you sharp
· It helps you spot potential problems
· It helps you prepare thoroughly
· It keeps you on track
· It motivates you to do a good job.
It is harmful when
· It affects your sleep, diet or family relationships
· When it causes you to be distracted in other circumstances
· When it sends you into a pointless mode of activity which is not leading towards the end goal.
From experience I know about myself that the greater the feeling of nerves before an event or project, the greater the reward after the successful delivery. Furthermore, the truth is, I have no evidence to warrant the nervous feelings anyway, no disastrous outcomes, failed relationships or hopeless projects that suggest the nerves are founded in reality.
The voice in your head that suggests it will go wrong, you won’t be good enough, you’ll forget a crucial detail just at the time when it is essential and all the other variations on a critical theme is only one voice, it just happens to be talking particularly loudly at that moment. The trick is to turn up the volume on some of the other voices, the confident ones, the rational ones the ones that know all your competencies and capabilities. Those are the voices that can reassure the nervous, critical ones, that can give a balanced perspective to the anxious ones and that can help you treat the nerves as a friend to be used and learned from rather than an irritant to be feared and frustrated by.
Now for those of you reading this and asking yourself “Do I have voices in my head?” Well, guess what? That was such a voice speaking right there.
And how did the project go on the 11th September? Well, my role changed radically with only a few days to go to a role I wasn’t expecting to be doing. All 12 of us worked hard and it was a hugely successful project and the results were excellent. I didn’t make a mess of things and my new role was central to the success of the project and I played my part and contributed to the overall success. I think nerves are ok and in fact, if it weren’t for nerves, I do not think I would operate at the level that I currently operate at, they keep me sharp.
There is some great work on handling nerves and anxiety in an article on Mental Toughness in the British Journal of Sports Psychology by Graham Jones; if you are interested in exploring this more please do get in touch.
Piers Carter
Leadership Coach & Consultant
Lovely ditty Piers. I too have the same experience and am aware that nerves have on occasion stopped me from doing stuff or caused me to put things off, to my later regret ... A good book that tackles some of this is Susan Jeffers "Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway".
ReplyDeleteKeep up the blogging chap.
P